Rejection sucks, doesn’t it? You spend hours crafting the perfect pitch, send it off with all the optimism in the world, and then—bam—the heart-wrenching “thanks, but no thanks” lands in your inbox.
But I’ll let you into a little secret: No one is immune to rejection. (Even Walt Disney was rejected more than 300 times before Mickey Mouse became a success!) And I can near enough guarantee that every successful freelancer has experienced rejection at some point.
No matter how good you are, there will come a time when you’re passed over for an opportunity or an idea is rejected by a client. But what separates the successful freelancers from the less-than-successful freelancers is what they do *after* rejection. When you (inevitably) get a “no”, it’s important to have a strategy and a way to cope with the feelings that come with rejection so you can keep moving forward.
So here are five steps you can take to handle rejection as a freelancer and move closer toward your next win!
Step #1: Celebrate the Positives
Okay, celebrating might not be the *first* thing on your mind after facing rejection, but hear us out because there is still a LOT to be positive about.
If you’ve experienced rejection, it means you’ve put yourself out there in some way. Maybe you’ve pitched a client, got on a discovery call, or sent a proposal—but most importantly, you’ve gotten out of your comfort zone. And that deserves a huge pat on the back!
The truth is, the more you put yourself out there and seek new opportunities, the more rejection you’ll experience. Rejection is a great sign that you’re growing as a freelancer.
Plus, every “no” you hear steers you away from an opportunity that wasn’t right for you and makes space for something that could be even better.
So by all means give yourself permission to sulk, but set a time limit on it. Acknowledging your feelings is important but switching your focus to the positives can stop that pity party from spiraling into self-doubt and negativity.
Step #2: Don’t Take It Personally
There will come a time in your freelance career when it feels like all you’re hearing is “NO, I don’t want to work with you.” And it can seem like the whole world is telling you that you suck… But here’s the reality: You don’t suck and you are good at what you do!
We know how easy it is to let all those rejections get you down and when your pitches are rejected, it can feel like YOU are being rejected. But that’s not the case. A rejection is not a reflection of your skills or your value; it’s just an inevitable part of working as a freelancer.
And when you look at it objectively, there are tons of reasons why you could get a “no” (or no response at all). Maybe they just hired someone for a similar role, perhaps their budget has changed, or they might have just had a bad experience with another freelancer—either way, it’s impossible to predict the circumstances.
Freelancing is a business and so you need to treat each negative response as a business decision. Think about how many times you’ve walked into a store, looked around, and walked out again empty handed. It doesn’t mean you’ll never buy anything from there again—it just wasn’t the time right for you. So move on from it (for now) and don’t forget to follow up in future.
Step #3: Ask for Feedback
Yes, rejection is disappointing (and boy, can it sting) but it can also be very useful. There will always be a reason someone chose not to work with you and if it was something about your portfolio, your experience, or your skill level that kept them from hiring you, you’re going to want to know about it.
To find out what the reason is, get in touch with your main contact at the company. First, genuinely thank them for their time and consideration reviewing your proposal. Then, let them know that you’d like to continue improving and ask, based on their impressions, what you could improve on in the future.
It can be as simple as, “If you don’t mind me asking, could you please share any feedback? I’d love to continue to improve my skills.” (Adapted to your own voice, of course!)
Step #4: Act on the Feedback!
Once you find out what was missing from your portfolio, experience, or skill level, you can work on it so you’re better prepared for future opportunities. One job rejection is just an opportunity to improve yourself for the next one, so dust yourself off and put yourself back out there as soon as you can.
Instead of wallowing in self-pity and convincing yourself that you “failed”, turn it into a learning experience. Be honest with yourself and reflect on what went well and what didn’t go so well. Did you focus on providing value in your pitch? Were you unprepared for certain questions on the sales call? Did you let imposter syndrome get in the way?
Taking action any time you don’t land work or a job allows you to pivot from feeling like you got nothing but a big fat “no” out of the experience, to realizing you got a ton of valuable information you can use to level up your skills moving forward.
Step #5: Set Realistic Expectations
Finally, the last thing you can do to help yourself handle rejection as a freelancer is to set realistic expectations.
I can’t tell you how many new freelancers think they are going to start freelancing and make $10,000 a month just one or two months in.
Can you make that much freelancing? Absolutely. But two months in? Not so realistic… It takes time to build up a business—and that’s why setting realistic goals and expectations is so important.
You are going to encounter nos (and/or a whole lot of inbox tumbleweed) along the way. And so instead of setting sky-high goals from day one, focus on the small wins and the actions you need to take every day. That way, when the inevitable rejection hits, you’re not left feeling crushed.
Receiving multiple rejections can make it tempting to stop pitching and putting yourself out there altogether. But that is the *worst* thing you can do!
Pitching is still one of the most effective ways to find new freelance clients—you just have to accept that rejections are part of the process. (Almost like badges of honor on the way to success!) So, be prepared to never stop pitching and—we can’t stress this enough—to *always* follow up!
Your Turn
How do you cope with rejection as a freelancer? Let us know in the comments below!
